Autore Topic: Il lavoro  (Letto 1943065 volte)

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Offline Shape

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Re: Il lavoro
« Risposta #1050 il: 16 Lug 2008, 16:58 »
Qui sono dei lavori interni al palazzo. Più che la mancanza di acqua (le mani le potrei lavare con quelle tovagliette umidificate) mi preoccupa l'impossibiltà di utilizzare i servizi :\

Offline MrSpritz

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Re: Il lavoro
« Risposta #1051 il: 16 Lug 2008, 17:01 »
Qui sono dei lavori interni al palazzo. Più che la mancanza di acqua (le mani le potrei lavare con quelle tovagliette umidificate) mi preoccupa l'impossibiltà di utilizzare i servizi :\

Andate al bar


Offline Shape

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Re: Il lavoro
« Risposta #1052 il: 16 Lug 2008, 17:06 »
Qui sono dei lavori interni al palazzo. Più che la mancanza di acqua (le mani le potrei lavare con quelle tovagliette umidificate) mi preoccupa l'impossibiltà di utilizzare i servizi :\
Andate al bar
Non so se è una battuta, ma io così farò: di sicuro fino alle 15.00 dovrò andare al bagno almeno una volta.

Offline MrSpritz

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Re: Il lavoro
« Risposta #1053 il: 16 Lug 2008, 17:07 »
non era una battuta ero serio

Offline Stay Black

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Re: Il lavoro
« Risposta #1054 il: 16 Lug 2008, 17:08 »
Se non c'è acqua nel palazzo, credo che potreste andarvene a casa
the more we know, the less we show

Offline Shape

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Re: Il lavoro
« Risposta #1055 il: 16 Lug 2008, 17:12 »
Se non c'è acqua nel palazzo, credo che potreste andarvene a casa
Ci è già stato detto: "E che fa? La trattenete."

O trovo qualche roba scritta o non posso protestare in alcun modo  >:(

Offline Stay Black

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Re: Il lavoro
« Risposta #1056 il: 16 Lug 2008, 17:14 »
Se non c'è acqua nel palazzo, credo che potreste andarvene a casa
Ci è già stato detto: "E che fa? La trattenete."

O trovo qualche roba scritta o non posso protestare in alcun modo  >:(

Sono quasi sicuro che ci sia qualche legge che lo preveda.
Non ci sono avvocati videogicatori qui sul forum?
the more we know, the less we show

Offline MrSpritz

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Re: Il lavoro
« Risposta #1057 il: 16 Lug 2008, 17:17 »

Offline IT74

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Re: Il lavoro
« Risposta #1058 il: 17 Lug 2008, 14:55 »
dovrei fare domani il terzo colloquio presso il "gruppo romeo"
qualcuno ci lavora x sapere se e' un bell'ambiente di lavoro?
ex niko974(4.125 messaggi)
su facebook: Niko Corfeo

Offline Gatsu

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Re: Il lavoro
« Risposta #1059 il: 17 Lug 2008, 15:09 »
Girata oggi nella mailing list dei designer dove lavoro io. E' lunga ma vale la pena :D
Rapporti clienti-designer, sembra Dilbert. 

---

Quotes:


client: "i need more pesshht peesshht chuttt chutt papapapa on this animation"


designer: "we should probably talk about the look and feel of the web site before we get to work. just explain how you would like it to look..."
client: "well, I don't think we really want it to look too much like a web site. you know what i mean?"
i looked at my partner who was about to burst into laughter. i didn't know what to say except "okay".


client: "more fonts. use more fonts!"
designer: "ummm... how many do you want?"
client: "how many do you have?"


client: "we love it like this, we were wondering if we could change the font and the color, and can we move a few things around? and please also put a landlord hat on the landlord."
designer: “……”


client: “i just don't understand why this flash cost so much. i mean, i can do the same kind of animations in PowerPoint. why can't we do something like in PowerPoint. it seems pretty simple to me.”


in a meeting the client told us to "think outside the box" and "make me uncomfortable". he quit the week before the site launched. guess we made him too uncomfortable.


client: "we want a website that can play DVD quality video, but we don't want to use streaming video and the load time must be zero."
designer: "that's impossible. everything has a load time. DVD quality runs about 100 megs a minute."
client: "we'll take our business elsewhere..."


client: "i want it tuesday"
it was monday.


client: "can't we make the text blink?"


client: “oh my god. i love the website you designed for us! it's ab-solute-ly brilliant and it looks faaabulous!.. but can i suggest a minor change? you think we could change the colors of the graphics? maybe make them more lighter? and maybe put the logo on the left side instead of the right? and the color of the text is perfect but we need it to be a little bit darker. is that easy to do?"
designer: " ... "


client: "could you change the interface?"
designer: "change the interface, of course but this takes days and it'll cost you some more"
client: "days?! a few images? i only want those buttons at the bottom to the top and make them more rounded and yellow...and the animation is ok but if you just place our new product in it, it would be great. can't you do that in a few hours? tomorrow we have an important meeting and we would like to show it."


client: “we also need a logo for our new site ...”
designer: “so what words come to mind when you think about how your logo should look.”
client: “well it should be 'fast' and 'very friendly' ...oh, and maybe look like an octapus with tentacles stretching out.”


client: “this is horrible, i want the menu more longer.” (no that wasn't a typo)
designer: “more longer...right.”
client: “yeah, and i think this should always be spinning.” (a graphic behind the content)
designer: “i don't think pepole will be able to focus on the words if we have this spinning behind it.”
client: “MAKE IT SPIN DAMNNIT!!!!”
(three days later)
client: “ok, i don't like this graphic spinning behind the text; you can't read the content. what if we make it more alpha.”


client: "why don't you add more colors? i see you have a problem with them.
i suggest you to make some therapy if you still have that fear to colors."


client: "we want it to be black, but could you not make it so dark?"


client: "i will pay you nothing and i want it all done in front page."


client: "i need security... i want security on every page... i know about all the deviants who are waiting to, what would you say, hack into my site and steal credit card numbers... oh speaking of credit card numbers you know that i don't really want an online store, but i want people to be able to buy things right? don't give them too much information on the site though or they might go buy from somewhere else"


client: “from my left eye to my right eye - what's that? you know, wideways...” (try width)


after having published a demo site for a client:
client: "can you print out a copy of every page in the site and post it to us?"
designer: "why??"
client: "we need to fax a copy to our US office so they can have a look at it..."


client: “i'm not to sure about that "sign on"-button. could you please make me 50 of them so that I can choose.


a client (and marketing director) came in to the agency to view the layouts i'd done for their corporate site. she flopped into the chair beside me and said: "you're going to have to explain it to me as if i'm really stupid." fantastic.


client: “ok, we want a flash intro with six animated words to fly across the screen. one at a time. and we need a 'soft landing' of our slogan on the home page. were trying to tell a story here."
designer: “ok.”
client: "but can you make it less than 7 seconds? we were at a trade show and they said you lose attention after 7 seconds!"
designer: “hmm.. well, 7 seconds / 6 animated words + 1 slogan.. like half a .75 seconds per word. i guess you dont mind if the user cannot read the content of the intro then, right?”
client: "well...do what you can."


designer: “so who will go to this site and for what reason will they go there?”
client: “i don't know”
designer: “well what is the purpose of this site!?!?”
client: “i don't know”


today, a client was going over one of the proofs i'd given him. he says to me(pointing to the title)
client: "can you fix the colors up here?"
designer: "sure. what'd you have in mind?"
client: "well, not sure. i'm pretty color-blind and it doesn't look right to me. what can you do with it?"
designer: "..."
client: "what color is it, exactly?"
designer: "............"


client: "this site should target young children, teenagers, adults, business owners, possible contributors, and the elderly."


client: "can you make the background constantly change colors? i want people to know that we are fun and exciting."
designer: "people will think you are trying to give them a siezure."
client: "look, just try it, and if we don't like it, we can change it later."
designer: "well, this will really, really make it hard to design the rest of the site if the background color is constantly changing."
client: "then make the rest of it change, too."
designer: ".........uhh, are you sure that's what you want?"
client: "yes"

client: "this looks like crap. why did you make it like this?"
designer: "you asked me too."
client: "if you knew it was going to look like this, why did you even bother?"
designer: "because I charge you by the hour."
let's just say that now he's a lot more picky about what random ideas he makes me carry out.


client: "can you add a frog, just jumping around the page. that's bound to get people coming back to our site"


client: "i really want to emphasize strategy and digital evolution. i have a poster in my office with a chessboard and in the middle is a window and in the window a chessboard, and in that chessboard another window. i think we should use that- and also put an eye with 1's and 0's in it"
designer: "umm, no"


client: "this is shit"
designer: "can you elaborate?"
client: "it's just shit"
designer: "i'm after constructive comments here"
client: "i want it more like a movie"
designer: "ok, but bear in mind it's a website and has to be navigable"
client: "why can't it be more like a movie, disney can make feature length animated movies, why can't you?"

Offline ferruccio

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Re: Il lavoro
« Risposta #1060 il: 17 Lug 2008, 15:26 »
Gatsu, questo dimostra che avere a che fare con gente del marketing è peggio che chiudersi le palle in un cassetto. Credo che per lavorare nel marketing essere idioti sia un requisito obbligatorio.

Questa è la mia preferita:

client: “well it should be 'fast' and 'very friendly' ...oh, and maybe look like an octapus with tentacles stretching out.”
E allora Mozart?

Offline Gatsu

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Re: Il lavoro
« Risposta #1061 il: 17 Lug 2008, 15:27 »
Gatsu, questo dimostra che avere a che fare con gente del marketing è peggio che chiudersi le palle in un cassetto. Credo che per lavorare nel marketing essere idioti sia un requisito obbligatorio.

Questa è la mia preferita:

client: “well it should be 'fast' and 'very friendly' ...oh, and maybe look like an octapus with tentacles stretching out.”

Oddio, uno che sa fare marketing bene ha anche una vaga idea di cosa si possa chiedere ad un designer e cosa no...

Offline MrSpritz

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Re: Il lavoro
« Risposta #1062 il: 17 Lug 2008, 15:50 »
Sono d'accordo con Gatsu, ma gli stupidi ci sono ovunque.

Offline Darkside

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Re: Il lavoro
« Risposta #1063 il: 17 Lug 2008, 15:57 »
Vedo che tutto il mondo è paese e le aziende non hanno la minima idea di cosa sia un sito web. Però qua è peggio, ci chiedono di fare un sito portandoci due foto e il logo in risoluzione infima, poi si lamentano se viene una merda. Oppure l'ufficio marketing del cliente non esiste. Oppure l'ufficio marketing esiste, ma la conferma della grafica e quant'altro deve essere fatta dal grande capo, che usa il computer come poggiapiedi mentre batte i documenti con la macchina da scrivere (giuro, non è inventata).

Offline Gatsu

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Re: Il lavoro
« Risposta #1064 il: 17 Lug 2008, 16:05 »
Infatti mi stupisco sempre di come persone stupide o ferme a 40 anni fa riescano a gestire un'azienda e a farci anche bei soldi. Non deve essere tanto complesso, alla fin fine.